Clinic with Sherene
August 28, 2007
Posted by kimayars Uncategorized
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Okay, I realized that this will be lost on a lot of folks, but to me this is just so funny I can’t get through it without busting out into tears. There are three things you need to know before reading on:
#1: My friend Sherene has a wicked sense of humor. She’s my riding buddy, a great friend, and we enjoy acting like idiots together (right cupcake?).
#2: We both subscribe to and read regularly the magazine Dressage Today. There is a regularly occuring feature called “Clinic with Lisa” which is where Olympic medalist Lisa Wilcox critiques reader-submitted photos of people riding their horse at different levels. It’s a really interesting feature, and she comments not only rider position, but also tack, turnout, and expression of the horse.
#3. I’m an eBay addict. I’m constantly looking for weird or hard-to-get items that have to do with electronic gadgets or horses.
While on an eBay surfing extravaganza, I came across a print of Winnie-the-Pooh riding Eeyore in a dressage test. I sent it to Sherene, and she wrote up her own “Clinic with Sherene” based on Lisa’s feature in Dressage Today… I did end up buying the cute print. The artist’s name is Ellen Maze, and she has lots of cute stuff on eBay. Check her out!
And now, “Clinic with Sherene: A Dressage this Afternoon magazine exclusive”…
Photo 1 – A Recipe for Disaster
Pooh writes that though he has been friends with Eeyore for many years, he got tired of listening to Eeyore’s self-pity binges, so decided to saddle him up and give him something to cry about. While it appears that some effort was made to improve the appearance of both donkey and rider, I’m afraid they have a lot of work to do. The first thing I notice is that Pooh is not wearing any breeches, or underwear for that matter. Proper, good-fitting breeches are essential for a polished picture as well as adding to the comfort of the rider. His jacket is ill-fitting and has short sleeves. Also, Eeyore’s bridle lacks a browband, and it appears that the noseband sits a little too high – it should not interfere with his eyes. I am also very concerned about that fact that your donkey appears to have no hooves. This is either a horrible case of abuse and neglect, or you have some serious trimming of feathers to do.
Pooh’s position leaves a lot to be desired. He holds his legs way too far back to give an effective leg aid. It appears that he needs to open up at the hip and roll his thigh inward so he is riding with the inside of his thigh on, not the back. In the photo, his foot is about where his knee should be (if he had a knee), giving the appearance of a “chair” seat. I recommend a lot of stretching and suppling exercises for Pooh, as well as investing in some surgery to have knees constructed. Eeyore suffers from a variety of conformation issues, such as a low-set neck (from all that woe-is-me stuff) that would make it hard for him to achieve an uphill, or even round, frame. He could also benefit from a more vigorous diet and exercise program. And Pooh has the worst possible body conformation for a dressage rider: short stubby legs, a long chubby torso, and short, chubby arms, all of which make it difficult for him to use supple, fluid leg aids and allow Eeyore to reach into his hand and make the most of his sad conformation. Pooh also needs to close his big, sappy mouth and balance his head over his spine.
Pooh, I understand you wanted to teach that mopey little ass a lesson, but I have to say, I’m the one who is crying after seeing your photos. Best of luck to you both, you losers.
Comments
This will make you famous, Sherene. Ha! Ha Ha!
Anyone seeking to match wits with Kim or Sherene - beware! These are seriously wonderful yet quite comically demented horsewomen…..
Ha! What a gut bender:)
Way to go Pooh and Eeyore! I’m built just like Pooh, and love to ride dressage on my “Donkey.”
Love Karen @ Elk Run
That’s so funny! What a cute picture though!
OH my gosh that is hilarious. I did get a good giggle out of it… thanks for sharing!
I made the header… I just found the photo and slapped my little title on it. If you want a header for your page, too, I can make one!
Well Ladies, It seems busy as you both are. You still have way too much time on your hands….thank goodness! That was hilarious.
Now that’s a great little tale to enjoy over morning coffee. My letter to the editor, ” Dear Sherene, I didn’t seen any commentary on Eyore’s mane & tail coif. It looks to me as though someone may have destroyed his natural tail & played “pin the tail on the donkey” just before this event & perhaps used a curling iron on his mane rather than traditional show braids . What do you think? How would you score this?”
Cheers for sharing!
Sherene, you got Lisa’s voice down perfectly. I laughed my head off! You are SO clever.
Gardenmentor — Tail extensions are often used to enhance the appearance of a thin tail, but I have never seen one so crudely (or cruelly) attached before. And perhaps Pooh’s short arms and lack of opposable thumbs (or fingers or ANYTHING) prevented him from doing a servicable job on the mane. Which brings me to another concern that I did not have time to note before: Eeyore appears to be in a double bridle, which is generally used only in the upper levels of dressage. I don’t know how Pooh can handle one set of reins, much less two. I have a strong suspicion that Pooh just likes Eeyore to wear as much leather as possible, while he himself refuses to be decently attired. It’s no wonder Pooh has such a rapturous look on his face.
Oh my gosh!! I haven’t laughed so much in AGES!! Great stuff!
Pooh’s NOT wearing white gloves. That severely effects not only the overal l picture, but his effectiveness as well.
my childhood is officially over… poohs gone X-rated!!
who remembers their shadbelly but forgets their PANTS? *LOL*
I also think it appears as if Pooh is using his voice, a no-no in the dressage arena. We’d hate to have him lose 2 points from an already pitiful score! ha ha
Thank you Kim and Sherene for making my day!
FROM THE ARTIST!!~~~I have never been on this blog before but it was forwarded to me, thank goodness~~my name is Ellen Maze and I drew that DRESSAGE POOH. I have not laughed this hard in a long, long, long time. I will save this critique FOREVER!! Thank you Sherene! May God bless you and your horse and keep on helping you developing that hilarious sense of humor. Oh…I am almost breathing normally now. I think I will go read it again… THANK YOU!
OH BY THE WAY!! If you want to see Tigger showjumping on Eeyore and Piglet jumping X/C on him, not to mention a dozen other events (western and english) look for them on ebay (search seller ID giddyupstudio). Mention this blog and I’ll give you 1/2 off !! Commercial over! I LOVE THIS CRITIQUE!!!
Are you channeling Lisa or what?!??!?!?!!
LOL!!!!!
Thank You! Thank you! I am sitting here sick to my stomach because I have a lesson in an hour… my horse ran off with me yesterday and I am pretty nervous about getting back on. I am so glad I checked my email and I haven’t stopped laughing. I needed this right now! Off I go to ride my own beast and this time, he WILL listen to me!!!!
thought this was too funny great sense of humor loved it!!!!!!!!!!!
should be a poster
would make a great kids book
AMAZING…simply amazing…
This is fantastic! I laughed so hard I cried! As a donkey owner, dressage rider, and Dressage Today subscriber I REALLY appreciate how creative this commentary is. You have the Lisa commentary down perfectly. Thank you for sharing your talent!
There should be a match between Kim and Sherene! LOL
I ride with Lisa and just forwarded the link to her. She left for Germany yesterday with her horses for a couple months of training with Ernst. I know she’ll get a really good laugh out of this! Great Job!
You should know though Lisa just finished her last article for Dressage Today. So no more ‘Clinic with Lisa’. Perhaps Sherene Should apply for the job?
I too am built like Pooh and can perhaps be more sympathetic than you. I do agree with the breech thing tho. Perhaps it would help tremendously on several levels if they were worn. I think the pair look promising, and with practice and diligence just might make it to the Olympics.
Look at Pooh’s smile! At last adressagerider that looks like they are having fun while they ride!
Very very funny.From a saddler’s perspective I think he has his saddle on backwards.
“Do It With A Smile!”
Until I read Rick Silvia’s post, I thought, “Someone needs to PLEASE forward this to Lisa Wilcox!” Thanks, Kim and Sherene - you guys made my day with this. Absolutely hysterical… :o)
You better hope that George Morris doesn’t get a hold of the portrait of Tigger jumping Eeyore!
Great art Ellen. I see you have Eeyore doing flying changes also. Any plans for some Eeyore piaffe paintings?
Thanks for the great laugh!
Thank you for the laugh. I now know what it feels like to have iced mocha come out my nose. I liked this so much I forwarded it to a friend who claims ” I look like Barny Rubble on a horse. ” I hope this gives her as much joy as it did me.
OMG…..I laughed so hard, I pee’d a little! Reading “Clinic with Lisa” will never be the same for me! Thanks! You absolutely made my day!
This is great. A riding friend, with whom I have often made jokes about the Clinic with Lisa section of Dressage Today, sent it to me. She knew I was a prime candidate for full appreciation of this very clever “Clinic with Sherene.” What is even more fun is the abundance of further comments/critiques offered by other dressage enthusiasts (addicts?). Thanks for a wonderful take on not only Lisa’s comments, but on all of us who are obsessed with this challenging sport. I mean, who thought up white breeches for showing, anyway?
HA HA HA!! This is hilarious! What? Dressage queens with a sense of humour?! I LOVE it! And I can tell you why pooh is one happy dressage rider, CAUSE HE’S GOT NO PANTS ON!! Although he may be anatomically disabled, I’m sure there must be some feeling of freedom riding naked. Although if it’s only from the waist down that just lands in the category of kinky. Oh well, whatever extends your trot I guess. Good one girls!!
This was wonderful! I might add that Pooh could do with s little Pilates to develop his core body strength — and he might lay off the Hunny.
Say what you will about Eeyore — he’s found a discipline that makes him happy at last.
Might Pooh be starting a new summer fashion trend for dressage? The short-sleeved shadbelly! Great for showing on hot days!
A Great Way to Start Your Riding Day
Okay, I realized that this will be lost on a lot of folks, but to me this is just so funny I can’t get through it without busting out into tears. There are three things you need to know before reading on:
Hi guys
I got this email after being in lockdown for 2 weeks after an Equine Influenza outbreak occurred here in Australia. I’m so glad I got this.. Its hilarious. As a dressage rider it just makes it even funnier. Keep up the great work & I’ll definately check back for more!
As of this date, your absolutely brilliant satire on Lisa Wilcox’s Dressage Today feature has been reviewed 71 (seventy-one) times on the New North Atlantic Dressage Association Forum. Congratulations to you on your originality and to us for being able to access such fine dressage intellect.
I am new to the blog scene and up until now I never understood it’s purpose - now I do, Wow - I loved the interaction. Yesterday I attended an open quarter horse/ paint show and I saw some of the riders whom looked pretty much like poor little Poo. I was also thinking of his little tummy problem and I know that Walmart carries a line of support panties to help him hold in his hunny tummy. Love to all and happy riding
[...] Pooh does dressage This was sent to me in an e-mail. If you’ve ever read the "Clinic with Lisa Wilcox" section of Dressage Today, this will have you rolling!!! Kim’s Fitness Through Dressage Clinic with Sherene And now I’m seriously thinking about going on ebay and ordering some of her prints. Here’s the entire dressage set: http://cgi.ebay.com/DRESSAGE-POOH-EEYORE-3-print-set-great-GIFT_W0QQitemZ250163270927QQihZ015QQcategoryZ3167Q QssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem She has show jumping and eventing ones too. Anyone up to do a George Morris critique on the showjumping one? [...]
HA! Way too funny! I emailed the link to my dressage friends as well.
Thanks for the laughs!
[...] Tigger and Eeyore do Hunters As per suggestion by No1Dazy for a George Morris style critique. It’s not as good as the original spoof, but here you go. The original — Kims Fitness Through Dressage Clinic with Sherene The source of the picture — TIGGER riding EEYORE Showjumping~8×10 print~fun Art!! - (eBay item 250161491561 end time Sep-10-07 20:10:21 PDT) This is a difficult picture to critique, because despite the rider’s complete lack of clothing I cannot determine whether he is male or female. I will thus adhere to my time-honored principle of "When in doubt, be harsh." The very first thing this rider needs to do is go back to flatwork and cement his lower leg, which has entirely slipped back. He has somehow managed to achieve an obtuse knee angle, which indicates that he is either a tiger or that his knee has been broken backwards. His base of support has consequently suffered, slipping so far back that his crotch is over the cantle of the saddle. His upper body is both roached and flung down, imitating the mannered, artificial style that is prevalant in show rings today. As a result the slightest misstep by his mount will send him over the horse’s head and headfirst into the jump — and because this rider is such an eyesore I do not necessarily think this is a bad thing, and do not think it necessary to suggest corrective exercises. Not surprisingly, he has completely ruined the automatic release by relinquishing contact and throwing the horse away. The horse is a tasty color but is a poor stylist. He has uneven, sloppy legs and is simply reaching across this oxer in a big canter stride. His sour, nappy expression is hilighted by his over-large ears. I have found that horses with ears of this size tend to lack heart and are in fact more useful (and even tastier) when used as paste. Turnout for this team is disappointing. The rider has neglected to clothe himself altogether; while this attire may be appropriate for halftime at a football game, it is in ill taste for a hunter class and is known as streaking. Keepers should always be used with a full cheek bit, and a noseband, browband, and throatlatch would also be nice. The rider has skirted the need for painting his horse’s hooves by removing them altogether. The wonderful thing about Tiggers is that this is the only one. Thank God. [...]
i sure hope you sent this to Lisa W…i can’t believe that she wouldn’t get a real big kick out of it
Hilarious! I would like to put this in the Central Texas Dressage Society newsletter. I am attempting to contact Sherene & Ellen Maze for permission. The club’s website is http://www.centexdressage.org.
Thanks.
are you gonna do commentary on piglet & eeyore riding cross country?
Shear Genius!!!
I didn’t know you were supposed to wear underwear! Thanks for letting me know. Maybe that’s why I never place!
Carol
This is hilarious!!!!
Would it be possible to reprint this in our newsletter??? We do not wish to just print it without permission.
Thank You Terry Carr
Oh LORD! I can’t stop laughing…stomach hurts so bad! I’ll never look at Pooh or Eeyore the same again…
Thank you for the pick me up.
I have always loved Pooh and Eeyore. No matter their short comings, I am glad they are brave enough to try something new…given their ages.
Next I would like to hear from them, in defense of themselves. Every dressage rider has a story, (or a set of excuses).
Margaret A December 15, 2007
This was truly funny. I haven’t laughed out loud that like for a long time. Very well done!!!—I do hope you sent it onto Lisa, I am sure she would love it.
This was hilarious, I’m glad I found your site through the Horse Carnival. My horse Erik was nicknamed Eeyore because of his woe is me attitude whenever asked to do some work. I just loved this.
Oh my gosh, that is pretty much the funniest thing ever….I loved the abuse part about the hoofs…
Kim, I don’t know how I missed this the first time around.( For that matter being a fabricaholic as well, I don’t know how I missed the fabric on ebay!) I’m so glad that you posted it in to carnival of horses. I hope it brings you lots of new readers. This is a real hoot!